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And then you will emerge, and I will stand there panicked and utterly lost, and I will beg you to please speak with me outside, just you and me, and you will, but by now you will have an impatient urgency to your voice, as you say: “Aiden asked me to ride with him to Colorado, and we’re leaving today.” And my facade will crack, and I will become angry, and I will say “I love you,” and Aiden will appear, and he will tell me that this is none of my business.

And I will stumble home where I will wretch over the toilet and then stare at the wall, and I will check my phone incessantly, and I will finally call you, and it will go directly to voicemail.

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And as the sky grows dark, I will watch you flush with arousal at Aidan’s mystery and his virtuosity, and I will retreat into myself, and I will deny that I’m seeing what I’m seeing, and then suddenly I will be alone with Aiden’s friends, and you will be in Aiden’s bedroom, and the door will be closed but not entirely, and I will hear, and Aiden’s friends will think nothing of this.

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